I felt compelled to enter a post (nothing fancy) tonight in case Meegan from Advice For Ladies drops by and wonders what ever happened to the story about my cousin Jimmie that I told her I was writing. I am still working on it. Unfortunately, I have encountered writer's block with that story.
In the meantime, let me tell you about my husband's latest techno toy, the Blackberry. For those who may think this is a fruit I am talking about, let me assure you it is not a fruit, although I think my husband is a fruitcake for deciding to get one. He knows both of us are technology impaired and haven't even mastered our VCR yet. But I digress. To continue. The Blackberry is a wireless hand-held device no larger than a small calculator which enables the user to go online, check his emails, leave emails, make phone calls, receive phone calls and I don't know what else it enables the user to do. One thing I can assure you it doesn't enable the user to do and that is take out the garbage.
So anyway, my husband Mr. SusieQ has spent nearly a full week of vacation getting acquainted with his new techno toy and he is still fuzzy about how it works and how to get it to work, consistently that is. First off, he doesn't understand the directions. But that might be because he keeps trying to read those written in Spanish. I haven't looked, but I am confident the directions are written in English as well. However, I bet they are written in techno English which is as good as Greek then.
My husband couldn't stop with just a Blackberry. He had to go out and get himself a Blue Tooth to go with it so that he could be completely wireless. I suppose there is some benefit to being completely wireless. I just don't know what that benefit might be. But I digress. To continue. For those who may think I am talking about the kind of tooth you have in your mouth for chewing purposes, let me assure you it is not the kind of tooth you have it your mouth. A Blue Tooth resembles an oversized hearing aid. It enables the user to be completely wireless when the user is making a phone call or receiving one with his Blackberry.
So, while my husband has been getting acquainted with his two techno toys, we have been doing this thing whereby he uses his Blackberry and Blue Tooth and, while roaming our house with both, calls our home phone to talk to me. This is how the exchange goes between us:
Mr. SusieQ: "Can you hear me now?"
Mr. SusieQ moving to another part of the house: "Can you hear me now?"
Mr. SusieQ moving to yet another part of the house: "Can you hear me now?"
And so it goes back and forth between us. I feel like we are doing a commercial for some cell phone company.
We went shopping a few days after he thought he had everything working properly with his Blackberry and Blue Tooth. So, I am sitting there in the car with him and notice that he has the Blue Tooth propped in his ear and the Blackberry hooked to his waist. "Get that thing out of your ear." I said. "It looks like a hearing aid."
Looking rather perturbed, he replied. "I am WEARING it....in case someone at the office needs to reach me."
"Why can't they call you on your cell phone?" I asked.
"Oh, I don't use that thing anymore." He responded as if I was old-fashioned because I still use mine.
It was at that moment when I began reminiscing about the good old heavy-duty phones we had years ago that came in black only, weighed a ton, and was the only phone in the house. I had an urge to return to those days of yore when, if you were lucky, you had a two-party line and got to eavesdrop and listen to juicy gossip. You can't do that with a Blackberry and a Blue Tooth, those good for nothing techno toys.